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Saturday, December 4, 2010


This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 17; the seventeenth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

“Who should act, without any questions?”

Breeches, tux, army muffler, Italian shoes and quite a good looking guy what else do gals would want (obviously the is limit tending to infinity here). Yes I know all of you can sense narcissism all over the words used so far, and you are right too. Our hero had a similar feeling when he went to the so called “Big fat Indian Wedding”. For those who have just read this phrase well this is yet another crown of western chivalry to “Poor India, Naked India”; for more feeling guys please say that in Hindi, for gals – what’s coming up in next couple of stanzas would make you get your shot guns (If you have any), Beaver claws (nails) would surely be up for a murder. Coming back to the subject of the story, obviously the Hero- with adorable smile, This Hunt had to be special because it was his* first outing to hunt, I mean look around cheeks and chicks. Scene was perfectly set, cool breeze rushed through the hot blood, sweat trickled on back of his* neck, excited, he started to look around.
{ Music – Here I am, this is me , There is no where else on earth I would rather be }

Scene { camera focus shifts } --- “I just finished seeing American pie, euro trip and gal next door back to back – So please bear if any obscenity in flow of words”.

 It was as if Aphrodite herself has taken several different faces and shapes`. Jaw dropping it was, {words in brain --- Beautilacious or bootiliciousJ}, perfect samples for research on topographies ;). Our predator was soon converted into the bait (A happy bait I must emphasis on it)

With the perfect back ground score –“love is all around us…Love is in air” He was soon in some kind of hallucination or I must say a different world, ruled by the goddesses of love and beauty.

{While the focus goes to the groom and bride for few moments—poor guys didn’t had much on this video}

Our hero chose her hunt, initial eye contact turned to witty smiles, and hindsight signals, A lot of feeling flew in air without any words being spoken. She was a damsel, her eyes , her lips , her neck all sculpted with perfection I must say. It went all good, as few common frens were bringing them closer (It get really clumsy in weddings in India), our couple deeply in hangover of each other’s aura were flowing with the emotions. They were just at one hand distance, the group almost intermingled. Picture perfect isn’t.

{Few introductory intros, acted as ice breakers, and it was all a hunky dories sequence) or should I say “Love at first sight”.

{We don’t have happy endings, If we don’t have a fight between villain and hero or Do we? what if Hero looses … sometimes he do. It gives high critic ratings.}

Something happened, something really dreadful, something which has happened many times in these typical love stories.
{ we will discuss this shot later , on the other frame we have a delighted love making shot going}

{Public affection of love, and dangling shots of flowers / or intimidating love birds. But since we are presenting an unedited coverage, I request reader’s discretion}

He was all over her, He kissed her, touched her (I really mean it ), She lifted Him , raised Him , He became excited ;damn excited I must say. They became cozy, really cozy, arms in arms. It was raining kisses and hugs. Lucky He, he get to feel her, so close, got to dance with her in public. The surroundings were having endless sessions of only two words, sorry total four – Love you , Sooooooo Cuutteeeeee. All this without saying or requesting, all unconditional love I must say. All what He has to do was to emulate her when she says or just gave that cutie looks... she was spell bounded by Him and His every little gesture. Grandiloquent – is the word which describe Him

Happyyyy Endingssss J

{Camera was about to focus on show the cast and crew page}

But than he* screamed in agony, turmoil and deep pain.  he* lost her in the battle of Love ,couldn’t win her from Him. Poor guy lost it real bad, I was there, trust me. So close and yet so far, and all he* gets was a smile in the end when she was about to leave. But that guy, that chubby little fellow had it all, I would have *&^&*….. No I don’t want to kill that little chubby fellow. I can’t. He was the clear winner.

Just when he said it couldn’t get worse then this and turned back to sip some water to calm down, he almost fell to tears to see the same little chubby fellow was with another angel (how smart are they[ chubby fella and girrlz ], and dumb are we …..).

Rest what happened was just a repetition of “shortest possible Love affair”. She loved Him not him*. It wasn’t the end of it , he* saw it in next three hours 4 times , in two different wedding, without editing all so painful to end him with a heavy heart and never-ending demise.  

Lessons Learnt:
1)      Look cute , chubby , adorable
2)      Wear pinks, prefer baby pink if possible.
3)      Pretend to be dumb and get advantage of getting closer.
4)      Fool them with your antics; they will follow your every move.
5)      Have a smile, each time they kiss or hug you and just after that pretend to be lost again, if you want more repetitions.
6)       Pretend to be smart, just pretend.
7)      Make all that clumsy little moves, they tend to excite her.
8)      Have that killer dumb smile always, and a feeling of  you want more of those hugs.
9)      Make yourself a little dirty with cake/ice cream/choc , special attention , even washroom routine are offered. Oh my god , I hated those little chubby cheeks.
10)  Just when you leave , pretend that you are giving her a flying kiss, mind me just pretend. You will get at least three more in return.
11)   Girls are the most smartest human being possible , They get all they want ( quite literally)  without resistance, zero efforts , in public ,any time, but provided guys be like the 10 above points , which seldom happen and thus the resistance plays such a imp phase in chasing and hooking up.

P.S.:-- Who was He and he*, I request you to take your imagination to next hill down the road. “A hunk, A kid, Or .........”. In short He is someone

 “who should act , without any questions”!!!!

 The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.